HAKE | Wed 4-15-26
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The Hake Report, Wednesday, April 15, 2026 AD
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| HAKE NEWS Wed 4-15-26
🗞️ News (CNN email, AP, Morning Brew, theSkimm Wed 4-15-26)
In the news today: Trump supports renewing a contentious foreign surveillance program; sexual abuse allegations spur calls for change in Congress; and an upcoming heat wave that could smash records. Also, Greece and Turkey clash over “Odyssey” soup.
RESIGNATION, RETIREMENT, EXPULSION THREAT(S)...
Los Angeles DA says Swalwell under investigation
CNN: Swalwell and Gonzales resign(?) from Congress under threat of expulsion — Ground.News: Republican Rep. Tony Gonzales of Texas says he will retire after admitting to affair with staffer — but he’s “retiring” EARLY, before his term ends.
M Tracey: Historically, EXPULSION has been incredibly rare in Congress (overrides voters), only invoked under extreme circumstances with clear-cut criminal wrongdoing (mtracey on X)
HE & SWALWELL GET RETIREMENT LATER (Google AI: is tony gonzales retiring or is he resigning? Is it malicious to call it resigning? Does he get a retirement — like payment(s)? Does Swallwell?)
Members of Congress are vested in the Federal Employees Retirement System (FERS) after five years of service.
Gonzales: He was sworn in in January 2021 and met the five-year threshold in January 2026.
Swalwell: Having served since 2013, he far exceeds the minimum requirement.
Calculations from the National Taxpayers Union Foundation indicate their yearly payments will be based on their length of service:
Eric Swalwell: Estimated $22,620 per year starting in 2042.
Tony Gonzales: Estimated $8,728 per year starting in 2042.
IRAN, VENEZUELA, DEPORTATIONS,
US military says blockade of Iran ports ‘completely’ halts economic trade
Mediators move closer to extending US-Iran ceasefire, officials tell AP
Children killed in Lebanon as Israeli strikes hit homes far from front lines of war with Hezbollah
CRIME, LAW
Justice Department moves to toss seditious conspiracy convictions of Oath Keepers and Proud Boys
On Tuesday, the Justice Department asked the Columbia Circuit to vacate seditious conspiracy convictions for Proud Boys and Oath Keepers leaders, aiming to permanently dismiss their indictments.
Following President Donald Trump's commutation of these leaders' sentences last January, Attorney Jeanine Pirro signed the filing, citing prosecutorial discretion to dismiss cases in the interests of justice.
Democrats on Capitol Hill criticized the administration's rhetoric as a dangerous attempt to rewrite history, slamming the president for pardoning over 1,500 convicted rioters last year.
EXCELLENT Appeals court orders judge to end contempt investigation of Trump administration deportation flights
A U.S. appeals court ruled that a federal judge must end a contempt investigation into Donald Trump’s administration over deportation flights.
The court said Chief Judge James Boasberg overstepped his authority in pursuing criminal contempt proceedings.
The ruling affirmed the administration’s right to halt the case, according to the majority opinion by the appeals panel.
In Its 50th Boat Strike, US Military Kills 4 ‘Narco-Terrorists’ in Eastern Pacific
OTHER NATIONS
Trump tells ABC News reporter he was not concerned about Orban's loss in Hungary
Trump Attacks Pope Leo XIV as 'Weak on Crime' (Daily Briefing)
Israel approves appointment of new intelligence agency chief (Daily Briefing)
Ghana's Dominic Frimpong Dies in Attack on Berekum Chelsea FC (Daily Briefing)
Zelenskyy Alleges Military Robots Captured Russian Battlefield Positions (Daily Briefing: Ukraine Claims First Battlefield Seizure Using Only Robots)
OTHER MESS
Woman shot dead after trying to kidnap toddler in supermarket and attacking him with a knife
On Tuesday, April 14, 2026, Omaha police fatally shot 31-year-old Noemi Guzman after she kidnapped a 3-year-old boy at a Walmart and slashed him with a knife.
Investigators determined Guzman shoplifted a large kitchen knife inside the store, then approached a child and caretaker, forcing them to walk at knifepoint into the parking lot.
Police arrived at 9:20 a.m. following a 9:13 a.m. 911 call; body-camera footage shows Guzman "swiping the knife at the child, cutting him across the face."
Cyler Hillman, the 3-year-old victim, underwent surgery for facial and hand lacerations and is expected to recover, according to his parents.
Omaha Police Deputy Chief Scott Gray characterized the incident as an "isolated incident," with the Omaha Police Department and Sarpy County Sheriff's Office conducting a multi-agency investigation.
HEALTH! Top Government Doc Reveals Trump’s Bizarre Theory About Diet Coke and Cancer: Dr. Oz Says Trump Believes Diet Soda 'Kills Cancer Cells'
On Monday, April 13, Administrator for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services Dr. Mehmet Oz revealed that President Donald Trump believes diet soda kills cancer cells, arguing the beverage's ability to kill grass implies it destroys cancer within the body.
Trump's affinity for carbonated drinks is well-documented, with the President famously installing a red button in the Oval Office to summon soda at will, and Oz recounted a recent Air Force One interaction where Trump claimed his Fanta was "fresh-squeezed."
During the "Triggered with Don Jr." podcast, the President's son, Junior, questioned the logic but defended his father's stamina, while medical experts emphasize that soda provides no anti-cancer benefits and can increase risk of over 10 types of cancer.
The remarks drew widespread mockery online, with critics questioning why a credentialed physician like Oz did not challenge the claims, suggesting a lack of professional integrity regarding the President's unscientific health theories.
These comments emerge as the Department of Health and Human Services resets national nutrition guidelines to "Make America Healthy Again," yet the President continues embracing fast food, revealing a stark contrast between administration policy and personal habits.
ACLU Seeks Apology Over Maryland Woman’s Facial-Recognition Misidentification
Erika Kirk Withdraws From Event with JD Vance over Threats, VP Says
Hochul Proposes Tax on N.Y.C. Second Homes That Are Worth $5 Million
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